Dear Future Daughter

6:45 PM 0 Comments

A couple of weeks ago, M asked me if I wasn't around, what would I want to tell my future daughter or son. I have rolled that thought around for days. I chose to address my future daughter first. The following letter is my answer.


Dear "Baby" K,

If you're reading this, I'm either dead, or decided to print this off of my blog I had in my twenties. (Hopefully, it's the latter.) It is my hope that you can take away some wisdom (if not truths) from this letter that will help you along your life journey.

First, let's address those middle names of yours. Growing up, I always told myself I wouldn't be one of those people that gave my kid two middle names. People change. I'm sure you've been told that you have your second middle name because of your paternal grandmother. She is an amazing godly woman. She is also one of the most incredible human beings I have ever met. You are blessed to have her as your namesake.

Your first middle name just proves my personalities flaws. Did you know I hate(d) my middle name? Your maternal grandmother hates her middle name. My maternal grandmother told me that she likes her middle name because "it's different, and I was named after my aunt." Blame her mother if you will. But we all have middle names that start with the letter a. So naturally, the sentimental child within me had to give you a middle name that also began with the letter a. You understand, yes? Also, your middle name is the french version of mine. I know it's weird. Deal with it. (Or least humor mother.)

If you choose to marry a strong-willed man (think your father, your uncle, and both of your grandfathers), know that you will need to compromise a lot. It's not wrong, it's just the way it is. Marriage isn't (and will never be) 50/50. There may be days when you feel like you're giving (up) more, but I promise that your strong-willed husband will be your best friend, and take care of you, cherish you, and love you like no one else ever could.

Settle while not settling. I know while you're being raised up in church that you will hear and see girls waiting on their PERFECT ONE. Here's a piece of earth-shattering news: there is no perfect one. You have no Prince Charming waiting on you somewhere. Instead of dying alone waiting on God to give you a scroll with your future husband's address written on it delivered by a dove from Heaven, settle. But, don't settle. Don't settle for someone who doesn't love you, or the Lord. Don't settle for someone that doesn't have the same long term goals you have. Don't settle for a man that is just as good as you could get. Settle for a man who has his bad days, but is trying with all his might to get where he needs to be in the Lord. Settle for a hardworking man, even if sometimes he works a little too hard. Settle for a perfectly imperfect man. You'll know. You just will.

Your cousin, Lena once said, "Being right is not the most important thing." Those are some seriously true words. You don't need to be right every time. No one likes an argumentative person.

More than not being right, I think there's something to be said about a person who knows they're right, but chooses not to mention it. Be graceful with people. I've learned they appreciate not being corrected more often than not.

Your husband comes before your friends.

You come from a long line of educators. Don't feel pressured to go into teaching. Don't feel pressured to go into a high-demand field (in 2015, it's nursing) for money. Do what makes you happy. Life is too short to do something that doesn't give you purpose.

Don't belittle people. Look people in the eye when they are talking to you, no matter how insufferable they are. Learn to smalltalk.

Don't become bitter. People will lie to you. They will try to do you wrong any way they can. If you let them, they will take advantage of you. People are only human, and they will disappoint you so many times that you'll want to throw them all away. Don't. While I'm not advocating you naively trust everyone, give people a chance. Every once in a while, you'll find a diamond in the rough.

You are so beautiful. Don't let anyone else tell you any different.

If you give Jesus your all, He will take you farther than you could ever dream. He is so good. Give Him a chance, and I promise He won't disappoint you once.

Clear nail polish will stop runs in panty hose.

Drink your daily recommended amount of water.

Wear sunscreen religiously.

Trust your instincts. Even if they make you seem paranoid. You're not.

Birth control pills can make you gain up to 5 pounds. It is socially acceptable to say they make you gain up to 15. Take advantage of this as needed.

More than anything, I want you to guard your heart. Guard it more than anything. Your heart is precious. Once you give a piece of your heart away, you can never get it back. Ever. So please, K, guard your heart. Because, men are jerks. I promise that if you keep all the pieces to your heart, your husband and marriage will thank you.


Momma loves you.

Jessica Wynn

Thanks for reading! If you liked this post, you're welcome to share it on social media, or email it to your mom. Make sure you tell your cats about me! :)

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